Breakfast at Tiffany's

At breakfast, the best meal of all, they had eggs, ham or bacon, and hot or cold cereal. Amid the deafening roar one morning their Company Field First Sergeant Drew, acting as what is now called Drill Sergeant,  entered the messhall and shouted "At Ease." Everyone, startled, hushed immediately. With Lewis Dawson's "F--- Y--" being the only thing audible.

Sgt.Drew stopped in his tracks. His face with its thick, curved mouth was a mask ugly with fury. In a split second he covered the sixty feet that stood between him and Lewis. Drew's excursion toward the grunt who had the balls to say that was reminiscent of Stanley Clement Moore's "Night before Christmas". "Away to the offender, he flew like a flash, tore open his coat and started to kick ass".

They've said and proven that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. Drew must've, despite being a sergeant, also have heard this. En route he stepped in eggs, oatmeal and kicked over coffee as he took the above table route straight to Dawson's throat.

          His tray was stepped on

The Sarge kept asking Lewis what he had said. Dawson desperately kept trying to tell him how sorry he was but each word was muffled by Drew's steadily tightening grip on his throat. Everyone was very cautiously laughing at Dawson's dilemma. Such was life in basic training at Fort Campbell.